"I'll Love You Forever......."

“I’ll love you forever….I’ll like you for always….as long as I’m living….my baby you’ll be.” I remember the first time I ever heard this quote (from the book “I’ll Love You Forever”)…I cried like a baby. What a way to rip a mom’s heart out. Especially a mom of boys.

What is it about the last one leaving home that just seems to put you in a tail spin? In just a few short days my baby is leaving the nest, flying the coop, heading north, leaving the cave…well, you get it. Tan is special…not just because he’s the baby, but he’s also the child who has lived with me the longest completely by himself. Four years…no one to share the daily attention with. All eyes focused on him.

We’ve also had to become a “team”. Right after Tyler left…Doug started traveling. A LOT ! That left me & Tan at home alone…A LOT ! He went from a dominant male house to just me & him. In the beginning, we had a lot of “quiet & painful” dinners out…just the two of us. Weird for two people who are use to a lot of noise, sarcasm, talking, and sharing at the table. But somehow, through it all, we’ve become buds.

Instead of writing a weepy and whiney blog about how sad I am, I decided I would share a few things I love about Tanner.

~I love that in 8th grade he got signed up for long distance track (had never ran track before) & instead of giving up as he got lapped by all the runners, he trotted by the stands, waved to the crowd, & flashed his pearly whites. The stands loved it.
~I love that he is so competitive. (I also hate that he’s so competitive..haha)
~I love that he took a negative “obsessive compulsive disorder” and turned it into a positive. He decided if he was going to be compulsive it might as well be about something healthy. He exercises religiously and has the biceps to prove it =)
~I love that whatever he puts his mind to; he finds success by doing his best.
~I love that he takes pride in his work.
~I love that he’s never missed curfew, I’ve never had to monitor his grades, nor his money.
~I love that when I was told I was losing my job in the school district and came home crying uncontrollably, he never asked a word, but walked over and put his arm around me while I cried.
~I love that whenever I showed up at school, for any event, he would come over and hang out, chat, and acknowledge my presence.
~I love that he could care less what others think about his relationship with his parents.
~I love that he loves hanging out with his brothers more than anybody else in his life.
~I love that you never have to guess what he’s thinking. Just wait 45 seconds and he will tell you. =)
~I love that after the boys arrived at my parent’s house, after mom died, he was the first son to walk over and put his arm around me. He also does this quite often in church on Sundays (one of my hardest days).
~I love that he’s not ashamed of what he believes and “walks the walk” to prove it.
~I love that he loves God and understands the importance He is in his life.
~I love that right after mom’s death, just a week later, he had to pull off being the lead in the school musical…and he did it.
~I love that every night, at curtain call; he would take his bow then throw a kiss to heaven. (I hope Sanma got a glimpse…just once)
~I love that 18+ years ago God decided I needed just one more boy
~I love that he told us (in so many words) that he’s going to miss us
~I love YOU….Tanner Austin Brodess and will miss you very much <3

Kids bring us joy. They change us. They challenge us. They turn our lives upside down and we often don’t remember life before them. They are the greatest blessing I’ve ever been given. I am one blessed momma.